For 10 years I’ve had a deep feeling of being disoriented
For 10 years I’ve had a deep feeling of being disoriented as if my life had lost all meaning; A feeling deeply rooted with anger and resentment.
I didn’t have the smallest clue about how things got this bad. I felt trapped. As if I woke up one day and there I was, My life in shambles, working in a job that made me miserable, feeling lost and hopeless.
I’ve always felt different, always felt like this one dumb kid who couldn’t get it right. As I saw my friends take on the world with a giant smile on their faces, I thought, they have it figure it out, But I didn’t. Something was missing… Hell, I’m still trying to put all the pieces together. I think we all are! I was overwhelmed, there was too much for me to handle.
I was looking for the wrong things in the wrong places.
Like a fish going in circles in his own fishbowl! Truth be told I was too irrational and idealistic.
I just, I wanted to do everything!
Paint a masterpiece, grow a profitable business, make an album, be a pro gamer, a pro skater, see the world, meet everyone, fuck everyone and be liked by everyone. I always had this buzzing my head, this pressure to be productive and squeeze every minute.
I have come a long way but thankfully I feel a lot more clear now. I’m grateful that I have so much less stuff to worry about. I can finally focus on what is really important to me.
It was to my surprise to find out that a lot of people are struggling with the same problem.
Here are a few things that helped me ease my uncertainty.
Slow the Fuck down
If you are feeling overwhelmed by your goals, You’re most likely going too god-dam fast. We all want the price at the finish line but is the price worth it if you beat yourself to death in the process.
In today’s world, we are conditioned to do too much shit that we don’t really need. At the end of the day, they are not that important. Not worth pursuing and definitely Not worth stressing about.
Things take time, more importantly, they take energy.
Energy and time are the most valuable intangibles we have in our lives. Stop wasting time on the irrelevant! Do things that make’s you feel proud of who you are. Get rid of the things you dread. why bother?
Slow down, Do less stuff and put some feelings into it.
Set out some time to sit down and think really hard.
Set out some time aside to think and get your act together.
Having a more organized idea of what to do and how to can definitely getting a better view. Prepare ahead of time, if you don’t know what to do the world will choose for you.
Better organization brings more clarity on what your goals are and gives you room to work on them.
Organize what must be taken care of for you to be able to focus on your goals without interruptions.
What the fuck do I want?
Sit down and figure it out.
Everybody has a different view of the world. You already know this.
How does your world look like? if you can only do one thing, The one thing that will make your life worthwhile, something that you can say ‘ This is Me’ I’m a …
Do you want to be the best parent? Now that is really hard.
The Road Ahead
Most of the time we fantasize about our goals only thinking of the end result, We can easily imagine ourselves receiving an award at the Oscars, Having a billboard with our face in it, Singing for a stadium full of people; ignoring the process required to get there.
Truth be told all of those things are hard and difficult to achieve, you better believe is going to take time and a lot of hustle, it will get tough and it will make you dought yourself.
Don’t be naive, Take your time and really think what would it take. what would you have to learn, what would you invest, what people are going to help you get, play out in your head all of the scenarios needed to get there?
Test the Waters
Go ahead and explore. Before you go diving head first, schedule a few hours a week to test the waters, get a feel for it. You might be shocked and realize you had over-fantasized it all along. If we managed to take a man to the moon you can certainly figure out how to schedule and find a way to test what you want.
What if I don’t do it?
Nothing! That’s what will happen. You will stay in the same situation you are in right now. Simple as that!
There is a small quote from Tony Robbins that he uses in one of his books, it says: if you want different results you must take action in a different way.
Different actions = Different results
Now This is the important part.
Normally we would think we only have 2 options, we either:
Do it – start organizing, testing and acting on what we desire.
Don’t do it – Come to an understand and choose not to commit, disregard it as just a dream.
Whichever option you choose fine. if after some careful thinking you consider whatever works best for you.
There’s also secret option number 3.
NOT DOING ANYTHING: This is the most important piece of information that I what you to consider.
What will happen if you don’t do anything?
Where do you see yourself in 3months, 6 months, a year?
If you do take action where do you see yourself in a year?
How long will that affect you?
Would you be ok not knowing?
If you are confused and don’t really know what to do, take some time to really understand what you want. Don’t wait till your 40 to enjoy your life, enjoy your life so you get to be 40 with awesome memories.
Celebrate the small wins, don’t wait to be perfect to enjoy life. Work towards something that get you up smiling in the mornings.